Ok this post is about smurfs; here we go.
They all live in the forest in little mushrooms, and they work together to rise over the other smurfs, only when they get ahead of the smurf Johnsons they help them out, and bring them up to their level - so they’re back at square one.
I have a few problems with the lifestyle they chose, I’m not going to bring communism up, because its been done to death, and I am a Christian I believe one day soon - Jesus will come back, kill my enemies, punish the people that piss me off, and high five me. Then we’re probably gonna go get some coffee and hang out. Then my good friend Jesus, and I are going to rule with an iron fist. We’ll make everyone equal. Equally worthless.
But back to the smurfs. Each smurf served a purpose: Papa smurf was their dad I guess, and solved conflicts that inevitably arose in the community. Carpenter smurf built stuff out of wood, like benches and those little wooden snakes they sell at the dollar store. Inventor smurf invented can openers or something. And then you have that smurf with the flower and the mirror in hand. What is the message they were trying to send to children with that smurf? all he did all day was look in his mirror, and picked new flowers to put on his lil’ hat. I don’t want to jump to conclusions, but I think they were trying to show kids that if they were gay they could just hang out all day and not have to work. This of course is far from the truth. I know a couple of gay guys and they have to work. To be honest, I don’t even know why they are still gay. The “don’t have to work” trick didn’t work out. Why not go back to hanging out with chicks?
Also, why is there a girl smurf? Smurfette - what is the point of having a girl smurf when all the smurfs are obviously asexual? I saw this movie and they said they don’t have anything under those little white pants, and I believe it because the kid that said it is a cowboy.
Another thing that has been bothering me is their little hats:
What is the purpose of those hats? What are they hiding? are their heads just shaped like that?
or is this their terrible secret:
I need answers.
Also in this article I will review the smurfs game that came out in ‘82 for the coleco vision. Man that was a shitty system. It was called Smurf Rescue:
Start review
It sucked.
End review.
Cristian Moreno
(google seems to rank me higher the more times i write my name :O )
